I have come to a conclusion: One must not live life in fear of being hurt. One must find an unshakable truth that transcends the pains of this world- and proceed to dive in. There will be no avoiding the troubles and trials of reality, but it is possible to prevail over them. The security that Christ gives us is greater than our circumstances. Not only is he the courageous God who overcame fear and sorrow- he is the way to overcome fear and sorrow, for each and every one of us.

This feeling was brought on by a number of things, I imagine. I had sunk into a strange mixture of complacency and frustration. One the one hand, I saw little use in persistently spreading the news of God’s Kingdom, having faced a lot of obstinacy during my time here. One the other hand, I had an irrepressible desire to burst forth from this ‘quiet desperation’ and be a hero.

I scanned back through my reflections on the book of Hebrews, which I have been studying, and found in them a radical invitation to engage in all the difficulties of life, with Jesus at the center of it. There was at once the striking reality of suffering and the amazing truth that Jesus will guide us through it. This has encouraged me to take up the journey with fresh vigor. It promises to be an adventure indeed.

Allow me to once again insist on the uniqueness of this place. There are brightly painted barber shops with names like “The Lord is my Shepherd”, walls of the brightest hue that shout “Jesus is the Lord and King of La Vega and of the world.” There are old men riding bikes with Arizona Cardinals ball caps, people selling fuel in pop bottles right on the edge of the street, from under a canopy of shade. There is a myriad of music, songs fading endlessly in and out of hearing as one walks along. And here I am: smack dab in the middle of it, with a calling from God and a bright orange water bottle.

I do feel I have found my element here, though, at least to an extent. I am deep in the Word, full of things to write about or draw or paint or sing about or simply rejoice over. My challenge has always been to step out of this wonderful introspective world and make things real: to commune, to share, and to experience. Pray that God would equip me with the courage to follow him faithfully, wherever it leads; to become a dynamic part of his kingdom, forgetting fears and embracing freedom.