This week- perhaps more than any other- I have received a sense of my belonging here. This culture has started to invade my lifestyle- even my worldview- and become a part of me. I’ve caught myself being way more honest with people, greeting others on the street regularly and joining in all their activities- singing and dancing or the like. The view of life here is light-hearted; people will discuss difficult topics with relative ease or cause what would be called an “uproar” at home and think little of it. There is a higher level of comfort with who we are in reality and this leads to a warmth and a freedom that I have never felt before.

One example: on Monday I was hanging out eating lunch at a friend’s house- enjoying speaking about different foods and who likes what- when one of the women took my hand, invited me out of my chair and handed me a broom. There was some Bachata music playing out back and so she urged me: “Dance with the broom.” I don’t know about this was the first thing I thought. “This is how everyone learns here,” she added. “Come on, dance with the broom.” So I did…it was fun. From that point onward I have grown to love dancing- especially Bachata- and I aim to practice and perfect this art as it is so central to Dominican culture. When people dance here, they forget about everything else and truly enjoy the moment. The closeness is casual and carefree.

A second example: On Wednesday afternoon I stepped out onto my front porch and saw a large crowd gathering on a nearby side-street. Other people were walking towards the scene and I assumed someone had been hurt or something important had been broken. I was right; I just didn’t know how right. As I neared the house I saw Danny- the pastor of our church- exiting the house around which everyone was assembling. “What happened?” I asked. Apparently there had been a fifteen-year-old boy riding a motorcycle when he got blindsided and killed by another vehicle. As I made my way closer a few children said: “Don’t you want to see the dead person?” Everyone was trying to get close enough to see this boy. I honestly did not want to, so I went back home.

I asked the father at my house, Antonio, if this was common. He told me it was customary to do so- that when someone in the community dies it impacts them all. I just sat outside for a while thinking about how open and real they are about death. I mean, I know we have open-casket funerals at home, but this seemed somehow more intense. The very same day, with the family still trying to come to grips with what had happened, people were crowding in to see. Death is real- they acknowledge it, gather to come to terms with it, and support each other in the midst of it. Such a communal way of doing it. These and many other experiences have brought me into Dominican reality in such a way that I feel attached and connected.

Work-wise I just finished taking photos of all the students at TEARS School, after which we took an excursion up the mountain La Travesia, enjoyed a dance party for my friend Yuneris’ graduation, and spent two tranquil and reenergizing days at the beach. Today is Tuesday- back home and back to work.

“Every man has forgotten who he is.
One may understand the cosmos, but never the ego;
the self is more distant than any star.”
G.K. Chesterton

Yeah- this week has been the strangest mix of good and bad; delightful and painful. Sometimes I just feel overwhelmed by expectations others have of me here, or frustrated at how awkward/ superficial relationships can be between people of different cultures and languages. Sometimes I feel afraid or worthless- or angry at those who see my existence here as a big joke.

At the same time, though, I have experienced moments of pure joy. Photography was awesome and so was the teacher training program. I feel blessed to have shared and learned from the Oregon team; they encouraged me in so many ways. Sharing stories on the bus was hilarious; I feel so wonderfully enlightened as to what Elizabeth and Darin have experienced.

On Wednesday night we all headed down to Los Pomos- another barrio- where the El Camino church was having a campaign. I was reflecting on my trip so far and different moments and I felt pretty lowsy prior to. My friend Aneudy prayed with me and later on that night we joined in the Virus concert. It was seriously amazing and by the end we were all jumping and dancing. Like I said, it’s been an erratic week.

The reason I included the quote up top is because of how it relates to us all. I was reflecting earlier on how- here in the world- ugly or poor or stupid people are seen as less valuable. We’re all struggling to be seen as valuable. My buddy Adelson said: “Inside, we’re all precious. God sees us as being worth everything; worth his very life.” Yet we still put a lot of emphasis on how we compare to others or whether or not others accept us.

If only I could forget about my appearance, or rather, remember that it doesn’t matter. Isaiah 53 depicts Jesus as someone people don’t even want to look at, but who in history has ever been so sure of who they are? He was lit on fire inside by the knowledge that his Father loved him beyond comprehension. This brought him bliss; this brought him glory and confidence and perfect, pure, sincere love. He was able to totally move past all assumptions, worries, fears, judgments, etc. and just enter into authentic relationships with humans.

But here’s where our problem comes in. We have forgotten who we are. I have forgotten who I am. I know this because I am prideful; I know this because I lack confidence. A knowledge of sin undermines pride while a knowledge of God’s love conquers fear. It is this intricate balance of two extremes that provides powerful freedom.

Yet my real self feels so far away; and my worldly self so enveloping and inescapable. It is amazing to consider how much of what I do is centered around or driven by how others may or may not perceive me. Somewhere deep inside I am battling to discover who I am. In fact, central to running this race with perseverance, will- for me- mean working past false judgments and working towards an accurate picture of my created self- how God sees me. I aim to throw off all that hinders and rush into a life of faith and love; knowing exactly who I am and allowing that security to flow into every area of my existence.

So those are my reflections this week.

On another note: If you are reading my blog feel free to message and let me know what you think.
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Peace

Derek

Oh Man!
It has been sweet so far.

I would say that a lot of what I’ve experienced here and learned can be sifted down to a central theme: developing a heart to follow Christ. That’s really where I’m at right now; just in a place of sharing, learning and growing alongside the people of Maria Auxiliadora.

Jesus said that “Whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.” I am realizing more and more the boundless applications of this statement.

My cousin Darin- along with three other teachers from Canada- arrived on Tuesday, followed by a team of twenty-three from Oregon on Wednesday. Needless to say this week has been out of the ordinary. The team from Oregon has been busy painting, putting on all kinds of kid’s activities, and leading worship services. They are a great group- full of energy and sincere love.

Meanwhile, the teacher training program is underway. It has been cool to sit in on a few sessions and see all the relationships that are being built and new ideas being shared. The teachers are just taking it all in and enjoying the experience. Darin has been doing his thing and doing so with vibrancy and talent. In the mornings he is teaching drama to the staff at El Camino, and in the afternoons a photography class. I’ve had the opportunity to join him and learn some new techniques and ways of approaching this art form.

I feel more strongly than ever that things like photography, art and drama are very tangible and important aspects of God’s Kingdom; that, rather than being simply extraneous things that we do, they matter. They are a beautiful part of the gospel of Christ. I’ve always been creative at heart, so that’s why I feel so inspired lately. Hallelujah!

Thanks for all your prayers back home.

What's been on my mind lately is thankfulness.
Thankfulness for the opportunity to be here and sharing among the people; to be investing in lives and growing in my faith. Over the last week God has really flooded my world with truths from his word. I feel like I have deepened my sense of how truly powerful and sovereign he is; my sense of how this life looks when compared to eternity.

On Sunday I sat in on a really moving message about the gospel. Fe spoke about how the gospel is God's power, and went on to demonstrate how it can permeate every area of our lives. He wrapped up with 2 Corinthians 4:7- "But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us."

I just feel like it is such a privilege to be a participant in God's Kingdom. That he has ordained me to serve in his mission is more than I can comprehend, but nevertheless I am brought to a place of joy.
A number of young leaders in the El Camino church have decided to start up a youth club for people in the barrio. I am really excited about this because it is such an alternative to what many young men and women are falling into and being enslaved by. Aneudy "blanco" and I are leading one group of guys- about ten in all. We have recently been visiting their houses and just talking about God and finding out where they're at. For me it has been a chance to build new friendships as well.

The Child Sponsorship program is taking more shape. I've got a steady workload ahead as we approach the beginning of the school year. I aim to get bios for all the staff at the school, write some more blog entries for the TEARS site and get new photos of all the students. Keith and Rachel Prickett from Oregon are helping us plan this thing and make it sustainable, along with some materials from the Elevation marketing group. I'm pretty amped to see how things go in the next month.