Where to start? It feels to me as though this has been a week of unprecedented activity: relationally, physically, mentally and spiritually. It has been almost too much to bear- in fact at the moment I feel really burned out, like I’ve been trying to do too much. Nevertheless, God’s grace has been flowing in unexpected ways, even in the midst of the ruckus. It has been utterly undeserved (I suppose, in the end, that is what grace is).

I feel like many of my closest friends are catching a sort of gospel fever; a real desire to be disciples. It has been awesome to share in this growth and at the same time praise the Lord of the harvest, who is making it all happen. On Saturday, my buddy Marcos was sharing on how he believes in God simply because his reason tells him it must be true. He spoke of the fragile equilibrium of our bodies, the atmosphere, the position of the moon, etc.- insisting that these point to something so purposeful that it quite likely transcends the universe altogether. Our current state does not explain itself; one must look furiously above and beyond mere physical realties to encounter their Source.

He added that believing in the unseen is not such a ridiculous notion after all, referring to the forces of wind and gravity, whose effects can be seen, though they remain quite invisible. The same goes for God: the evidence of his existence can be seen everywhere- all the harmonious orbiting and rotating of massive bodies in space, sustaining one another, in the coming and passing of seasons, the rising and setting of the sun, the stars coming into view and disappearing anew. I was reminded of the place here G.K. Chesterton states, in his book Orthodoxy: “There was something personal in the world, as in a work of art; whatever it meant it meant violently.”

When God is part of the discussion, it can be felt. That afternoon I walked home feeling quite enlightened and overjoyed. To see such faith and desire to chase after the truth is beautiful thing. My prayer is that these friends of mine, as well as my family, will continue to walk in the paths of God, letting him lead them out into open spaces of freedom. I love the way this is expressed in Proverbs:

“The path of the righteous is like the first gleam of dawn
Shining ever brighter till the full light of day.”

After loading some music creation, editing and recording software onto my computer- as well as buying a microphone- I have become a sort of amateur DJ down here. My friends and I have been making beats and putting together some loops, samples, even some full rap songs. I really enjoy it; it’s been a time of learning and explosive musical creativity. That’s the only way I can explain it. My friends have been bringing some Christ-centered messages into the mix. They keep encouraging me lay down some rhymes in Spanish, so I’ll have to try to translate and memorize some of what I’ve written, making it coherent and understandable to those around me.

Hip hop is an incredibly popular form of music down here. Every young guy dreams of being a ‘Rapero’ or rapper, so it has been fun to walk alongside so many youth and support them in their dreams. Everyone in the community also looks up to guys like Fe and Bertico, who are recording professional albums, doing concerts in Maria Auxiliadora and other barrios, and bringing some intelligent, edifying lyrics into the world of rap. I can often hear my aspiring neighbors playing instrumentals next door and practicing coordinating their verses and choruses and all that.

But yeah, it’s been all about God and I praise him for that. One thing I aim to do is set aside more time and devote myself to him, because spiritually it is so essential and- really- the only reason I was created was to grow into the eternal kind of life that God offers, enjoying him and glorifying him forever. As I move forward in being a disciple I want to do whatever is necessary to actually put into practice what Jesus, the Master, said was best.

It’s easy to get caught up trying to do too many things, especially when those around you regard you as a sort of pseudo-savior, asking you constantly for favors or to borrow things or to help them with this or that. Maybe they want to learn English, or want some photos printed, or want to borrow my MP3, or don’t have enough food, or need some money to repair their house, or want you to paint them something- any range of things that they constantly look to Americans to help them with. I want to move past all that, though, and lead those around me to Jesus. He is the one they really need.

As I look out my window right now, I can see something that the people here call ‘Agua Sanjuanera.’ I wonder if you can guess what it is... It’s when the rain and the sunshine combine; cloudy in one spot and clear blue nearby. We walked outside to enjoy it for a while- arms outstretched and mouths open- relishing the wondrous moment. It was so wonderfully warm and refreshing; like drops of heaven hitting my face. I will never forget it. It is just one small way in which the Lord has truly blessed my time here.

The extent to which I have ‘found my element’ here has been nothing short of incredible. I guess I have had trouble getting over the conceptions that a foreigner could be so much a part of this community. Certainly it has been a long process, and definitely God-guided, for which I am thankful.

I offer several reasons: One is the warm, social culture and environment that makes one feel comfortable and welcome. I have a great family in which I feel free to be myself; I could even say that I’ve encountered a neighborhood in which I feel this way. At home, it may be possible to go years without even knowing or speaking with one’s neighbor. But here that is literally impossible. For one thing, you’re in such close vicinity and there’s such little noise-blockage that you inevitably hear much of what’s going on in the house next to you. This often encourages house-to-house singing and joking, mingling with the afternoon heat and multitude of music. Secondly, neighbors rely on one another to such a deep extent that you can enter any given house at any given time and are likely to find two or three visitors. It is a colorful, thought-provoking atmosphere that encourages and fosters growth in discipleship.

Now, before I go any further, do not suppose I am bashing Canada. I’m not. Believe me, there are times when I wish I could warp back home for a while and have all the comforts and familiar food, language and tranquility that I have always enjoyed. But despite that I do honestly feel I have found a second home. It would be a lie to say that my personality here is not different; I doubt it could have remained the same in a culture such as this.

The vicinity is definitely a big factor. Having so many people so close means I can walk down the street and check if ‘so-and-so’ is in their house. If not, I can continue walking and encounter ‘fulano’ lounging on their patio. We may sit and drink coffee for a while, catching up on life and perhaps going deeper, after which there is still time to visit one or two other friends in the same afternoon.

Vendors swerve by in vans, announcing ‘milk, milk, milk!’ to the whole world. If people pass our house at lunch time, Antonio (the father) will shout: ‘you get in here and eat some stew!’, or whatever we happen to be eating that afternoon. ‘Food is good and important and you simply have to enjoy it; now come and sit down and munch with me!’ That is how central sharing the experience of eating together is to Dominicans. If you’re lucky you may even catch me singing along to ranchero music and evoking laughter, while Antonio contentedly patters away at a broken pair of sandals, joining in the joyous harmony.

As I sat out on my patio the other day, relaxing, observing all the people passing by and children playing in the streets, I was forced to really reflect on what it is like to live in the slum. Here I am: the barrio man, living in the ghetto- and, believe it or not, I enjoy it! Somehow the tremendous sacrifices I’ve made do not even seem worth comparing to the wondrous mysteries of God I have encountered. His kingdom shines among the poor and thrives in centers of destitution.

It feels liberating to have an understanding of the language and culture- to be able to interact and be accepted into this new world where snow is unheard-of and people see life in a very unique way; a filter of perception that drives their actions. In their poverty the people have formed close and crucial bonds; now I am a part of that. I know and am known by countless people, all of them very special to me. I say I love it here, but I am certain there are few who feel that way. A tension exists: many want to escape.

I have often wondered what it would feel like to grow up here. Doubtless one would be mistreated- perhaps by parents- but definitely by those around them. It is common to hear mocking and insults, or to see young ones running out of their house screaming and crying. Gossip is a common weapon as well, destroying the trust and confidence of many.

The influences of pop culture, especially from the United States, are incredible. Girls feel they ought to be sexy and slim. They regard their bodies as mere objects- though this is no surprise: every man in their life has been asserting, from very early on, that this is so. Due to injustice and lack of opportunity, girls feel that their body is their greatest asset; they dance and flaunt themselves in hopes of attracting men, in order to get married and secure a future- ideally to move up the social ladder. Yet time after time they attract the wrong ones- abusive ones. This almost inevitably leads to bitterness and cynicism towards men in general.

Boys are taught to be tough and assertive; to show little emotion at the realities of life and to command respect, violently if necessary. This, in combination with the image embodied in rappers like 50 Cent, Daddy Yankee and El Lapiz has led to hardness and near disdain of the opposite sex. They want to be thugs- to be feared, cool and adored by the ladies. They get into drugs as a way to forget about the pains of the world, or to gain money. Of course, I am here depicting the negative extreme, but nonetheless it is all too common.

In the entire barrio there is a sense, I feel, of helplessness. America, or the American lifestyle, is looked at as heavenly, and everyone feels dumbfounded as to how to achieve it. I try to explain, where possible, that these desires are almost entirely contradictory to true fulfillment, but it’s hard to convince. Dominicans have it in their minds that the U.S. is some sort of utopia, worth hoping for, even if they hope in vain. Opportunities to advance socially are financially are almost non-existent; being born in the barrio simply means that you are hundreds of times less likely to ‘make it’.

Thus, people hang out on street corners or in Colmados with little to do. They play all sorts of games for hours and hours: checkers, chess, soccer, basketball, dominoes, baseball and marbles are among the most popular. Kids guide tires down the street all afternoon, or play with any object they can get their hands on. People look also to dancing and music; an opportunity to forget and simply enjoy the moment, many call it. Though this often involves alcohol and the movements are, well, sexual. During their afternoons, many sit down and become entranced by idealistic soap operas on TV that idolize romance. Girls dream that some wonderful man will sweep them off their feet and take them away to perfection.

There is only one such man to be found: his name is Jesus Christ. But here, perhaps, is the greatest barrier that exists. Catholicism has turned him into an abstract and far-off concept. He is certainly seen as the Alpha and the Omega- the one who will judge between the goats and the sheep- but not as a personal friend who invites you to follow him in your daily life. People live under fear that they must live a morally faultless life to please him, and everyone is certain they will face many years in purgatory before they are ‘worthy’ to enter paradise. The cross has lost almost all relevance to reality; many remain slaves to religion. God is introduced as the one who likes you if you do this and doesn’t like you if you do that. If you’re good, he’ll let you into heaven; if you’re bad, he’ll send you to hell. Who would want to know or even believe in such a deity?

It comes as no surprise, then, that in a country where 96% are professing Catholics, evil and injustice run rampant. The system is perfectly designed to provide such results. People are being turned away from God.

So I’ve painted a pretty dark picture so far. Let me proceed to introduce the light that drowns it all out in unstoppable glory. As C.S. Lewis puts it: “Our Great Captain has opened a gap in the pitiless walls of this world and bids us come through.” No shadow can keep out God’s Trinitarian dance of love and glory forever. The party’s on its way. We are receiving an unshakable kingdom; one where disease, poverty, injustice, sin and death will be completely done away with. Jesus is making all things new; we shall soon shine in such a brilliant community that all our sufferings will be to our glory. Shalom- the way things ought to be: the webbing together of God, humans and all creation in equity, fulfillment and delight; universal flourishing, wholeness, a rich state of affairs in which natural needs are satisfied and natural gifts are fruitfully employed all under the arch of God’s love. That’s what’s going on.

As for me, I live to demonstrate this hope through my words and actions, guiding people into harmony with their Savior and with one another, through the power of gospel and God’s grace. It has been an adventure of reconciliation so far, and I rejoice in the Lord.